Sugar just might be the ruination of me and my much beleaguered parenting skills. This Halloween marked the second one in which the boys have discovered a great love and desire for candy. I want them to have the experience of getting dressed up and running amok after dark, but the candy I could frankly do without. Sugar now seems to be their reason for existence.
Much like candy, pies and cakes, take center stage over the meaningful and festivity-driven holidays/special occasions. Birthdays are for what? They are solely for the purpose of cake ingestion. Thanksgiving? Well, that’s for mashed potatoes and pies (of which, my three-year olds must have at least three slices…topped with ice cream).
That’s fine, so long as I am not the only one saddled with the responsibility of watching them demonstrate their parkour skills. In fact, eating a holiday meal at another family member, or friend’s home is ideal even if one may not have leftovers for weeks to come. Thanks to the in-laws doing all of the work, I not only have a relatively clean…er…no filthier than normal kitchen, I also don’t have to deal with the screaming demands for pie. Nope. You can’t have any, because we don’t have any pie in the house! No chocolate or sugary frosted coma drops either! Don’t even ask for them after dinner, because they simply do not exist.
This also makes me look much more adult, and saves me the awkward moments of being caught by my children, hunched over Gollum-style, in the kitchen, with a mouthful of pie. No pie in my home means no explanation/justification as to what’s really in my mouth, or why I get to eat pie for breakfast, but nobody else does.
Really though, pie baked by someone else is simply far more appealing than one that I created. I just wish I had one now…
Now that I think about it, beer and pie might not be that bad for breakfast tomorrow…I’m gonna go bake a pie.
