Fighting is just a lifestyle in our house these days. I’ve given in to the idea that the boys will inevitably maim or contuse one another, or perhaps dislodge somebody’s eye. Until today, I was pretty much the sole audience for this sort of beastly entertainment. I keep thinking that it’s because they are three, and as all three-year olds do, they get rather frustrated when they can’t express themselves properly. However, I am changing my mind. I mean, really, effective expression has nothing to do with it. By the time they were 2 they could both speak like news anchors, albeit drunken ones. They spoke clearly, and better than most five-year olds we know (not to mention their vocabulary exceeds that of many adults…though, not always in an acceptable way).
I realized, today, upon receiving an “Incident Report” from the school, that it really is just brutality over not being able to force one’s will upon another body. That people have an often violent aversion to doing what others tell them to do. It’s like sharing. Nobody likes to share, and I don’t care how old you are. Human beings are simply NOT GOOD at sharing.
Today, as always, I was greeted at the boys’ school by the ever-friendly girl at the front office. However, she seemed particularly jovial, if not trying to hold in some giggles. As I signed the boys out, she handed me the “Incident Report,” and then let go of the laughter that had been building.
They aren’t supposed to name names, when it comes to “Incidents,” but she exploded with laughter, telling me that it was a bit of brother-on-brother violence…She laughed even harder when I read the report, which also made me laugh. “Liam bit Finn?!” I asked in stymied confusion. “Are you sure it wasn’t the other way around?” She assured me that Liam was the biter, and Finn was the victim. Turns out, Finn was taking too long to wash his hands, and Liam wanted to wash his, so, he chomped Finn on the back.
I guess Liam learned from the best, and the best got some of his own.
I am feeling the strain and pull of the world upon my children, and I don’t like it. The first day at school wasn’t so bad, but as they encounter others, I feel like a little of their own personalities are disappearing…little by little. For the first time, the world at large has possession of my children. It can tell them what to do, how to think, and what to feel, and without even knowing it is doing so. Other children and their annoying habits seem to be rubbing off on mine. Granted, I only hear the “catch phrases” that are constantly repeated (to their delight at being cool, and my sinus-infected disagreeable self), but I realize that this is now my world.
I want them to be comfortable enough to be a part of the world, but I don’t want them to lose themselves to the memes, like so many others. They are odd, and I want them to embrace that, not be ashamed of it.
Nostos algos,
Pru
